Broken Dreams
by xInfinitelyOriginalx
Summary: A Kucy one shot that came to me while watching Big Time Dreams. What if Kendall's dream is something far different than anyone could have a imagined. Kucy feat. slight Jucy and Jendall. Rated T just to be safe!


**Broken Dreams**

Kendall's POV

The audience was cheering, I knew that much, but it was merely a distant roar in my ears, like hearing the ocean from far away. I could, however, hear the loud beating of my heart as I stared at the stage and watched James and Lucy kiss.

It was a strange feeling that was coursing through me: a mixture of shock, happiness for my friend and a small _teensy_ bit of hurt.

Ok, maybe not so teensy.

It was like… just watching her with someone else made all my old feelings for her resurface in seconds. _Stop it, _I had to remind myself. _Jo is waiting for me backstage and I... I love her. _

By the time I focused my attention on the stage again, both Lucy and James were gone and for some reason, that only made the hole in my heart bigger.

* * *

"Yep," James said, grinning goofily. "We're officially dating!"

My heart sank slightly and I furrowed my eyebrows, still not entirely sure what I was feeling. Within seconds I regained my composer and slid an easy grin onto my face. "That's great, man!" I congratulated him, hoping my tone didn't sound as fake as it did to my own ears.

* * *

"Hey Kendall," Jo's voice sounded just as cheery as always, even over the phone. "Are you free tonight; I feel like I haven't seen you in forever."

I pursed my lips, slightly annoyed. I wasn't really in the mood to go on a date. "Um…" I replied indifferently.

I heard the muffled sound of Jo talking to someone else before she addressed me again. "Kendall? Yeah, I was just talking to Lucy and she asked if we could make it a double date with her and James! Would that be ok?"

"Yeah, sure," the words slid out of my mouth before I could stop them.

* * *

It felt strange, Lucy being on a date with me but not _with _me. It suddenly occurred to me how we never actually got to go on a first date. The thought bothered me and I guess Jo noticed because she nudged my arm.

"You ok?" she asked, eyebrows furrowed in confusion.

I smiled in spite of my depressing thoughts. "Great," I slid an arm around her shoulder and she leaned into me. _See? _I thought to myself. _Jo's great, why do you even doubt your choice? _

But I knew, and the answer was laughing with my best friend across the table.

* * *

I decided to confront Lucy that night, pulling her away from the table when James and Jo were caught up in talking about some new mall that was opening soon.

"What do you need, Kendall?" she asked, her hand on her hip. That was a good question. What _did_ I need?

"Um…" I wracked my brain for something- _anything_- to say to her. "I never apologized… for how we ended."

That wasn't what I was expecting to say and if it surprised me, Lucy looked shocked. She tensed and scowled slightly. "That was a long time ago," she said stiffly. "I'm over it."

"I'm not."

I hesitated briefly before bringing my hand up to rest gently on her cheek. Her eyes widened and her jaw dropped a little. "Kendall, what-"

I cut her off by capturing her lips in a kiss. She pushed me back gently after a couple of seconds, confusion evident in her eyes. "You're with J-Jo," she stuttered. "And I'm with James. And... and we're both happy. Just leave it as is... please."

She shot me a confused glance, stumbling back a step before turning and going back to the table. I just stood there, motionless and even more confused than before. I thought back to the night of the Tween Choice Awards.

_Funny, _I thought. _Everyone's dream came true that night. Everyone's but mine._

* * *

**So watcha think? It's pretty angsty but I was dying to write this so I decided to. I'm actually pretty pissed off with how Big Time Rush ended, I hoped so hard that there would be some sort of Kucy closure at least, you know what I mean? I mean (ok I'm gonna rant now) Lucy got a 10 in Love Science so that means Kendall loved her, right? Right. You don't just instantly stop loving someone! I mean come on! It's just... grrrrrrr. But the entire episode of Big Time Dreams, I was thinking: Kendall doesn't have a dream or what if he's hiding it for a reason?! Right? right. **


End file.
